I really wish i could. See the bigger picture that is. Lately I feel so caught up with every little stress, decision, question and day. Its overwhelming and I don't really know how to cope. Leaving YWAM has been a harder and weirder transition than I could ever have expected. I mean, I'm still living with a bunch of ywamer's, even in the same city still, but the space and change that has taken place is already so big I feel like I've been done for months and months. Its definitely weird. It's weird trying to translate the last 4 years of my life into this new season I am in....the "working" season. Where I am just out in the world. With the so called "heathens." Being salt is not as easy as I thought it would be. I find I am battling off all sorts of lies that seem to be hovering over my head these days. Feeling like a failure. What do I have to show for the past 4 years of my life. blah blah blah.
There's so many things I want to do, so many directions and possibilites....which is why I wish i could see the bigger picture. Just a glimpse...so I can forget about the little things that just don't need to be worried about.
Wow I just realized, I think I stress more than I dream these days. That sucks. I need to change that.