1.10.2007

Confessions

I embarrassingly spend more time getting ready in the mornings than I do on my quiet time.
I havn’t prayed, what is on my heart, in way to long.
The amount of people that I owe emails, letters and phone calls it is overwhelming.
I am a missionary currently residing in Vancouver, but the amount of non-believers that I am in relationship with regularly is embarrasingly small.
I weirdly always feel like I have to prove myself, then in my fashion, I rebel against that and don't do anything. Here starts the cycle.
Sometimes I am so thickheaded, that in order for me to learn a lesson, I may as well switch my name name to Jonah.
Sometimes, my faith is only held together by the beautiful, intricate, colours and designs that He displays before me everyday.
I suck at going to church.
Peter is the one guy in the Bible that gives me hope. We are one in the same. We have both denied Christ, more than once.
I am weak in discipline.
Sometimes I ever wonder, if I will stop apologizing for the same things over and over to God.
I often wonder why I am so good at hearing words from the Lord for others, but when it comes to hearing for myself. I suck.
I am so desperate for Change. Clarity. Revelation.

4 comments:

nakedpastor said...

hm. don't you think all of us could say the same thing. i think so.

Anonymous said...

Yes, I agree. We all feel that way, some time, I think. You express it better than I could though.

jacqui said...

thanks for being honest. i could use a dose of that.

Jo said...

yes, i think we all go through times where we could confess these things. at least i could. try not to be too hard on yourself hannah! oh, and you take fabulous photos.