1 Samuel 1:12-17

It so happened that as she continued in prayer before God, Eli was watching her closely. Hannah was praying in her heart, silently. Her lips moved but no sound was heard. Eli jumped to the conclusion that she was drunk. He approached her and said, "You're drunk! How long do you plan to keep this up? Sober up, woman!"
Hannah said, "Oh no, sir - please! I'm a woman hard used. I haven't been drinking. Not a drop of wine or beer. The only thing I've been pouring out is my heart, pouring it out to GOD. Don't for a minute think I'm a bad woman. It's because I'm so desperately unhappy and in such pain that I've stayed here so long."
Eli answered her, "Go in peace. And may the God of Israel give you what you have asked of him."
"Think well of me - and pray for me!" she said, and went her way. Then she ate heartily, her face radiant.

Sometimes I feel like this is the story of my life. I always seem to be misunderstood or read wrong. I dont know if it is because of my tone of voice, my body language, the feeling I give people or the way in which my muscles in my face contort themselves....I have no idea! I have spent so many times trying too hard to smile more, or sound happier or change things about myself so that these misunderstandings would stop. Its hard finding a balance of learning from critiqing and just being ME. I'm either to pushy or abrasive or I get walked over. I can never seem to explain myself right in a conflict. Lots of times I feel like my heart crys are only heard as mumbles. When will this world stop thinking of me as a drunk woman but more as a woman of passion crying out to GOD? My biggest frustration is that words in the English language never seem to be able to expres what I am trying to say..Ahh these are the days of my life.

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